7 Traits Of Irresistible Men

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7 Traits Of Irresistible Men
It takes more than rock-solid abs to reach the top of the sexiness charts.

We're not going to lie. A man boasting abs chiseled to perfection and biceps that pop just enough when flexed (without shredding shirts He-Man style) will no-doubt turn our heads. And even if caught mid check-him-out glance, we're not about to look away. Fit, toned bodies are the result of hard work and dedication to a healthy lifestyle. We certainly pay homage to that. But for a man to achieve a skyrocketing score on the sexiness scale there's got to be more to him than physical assets. Throw in these seven traits and he's guaranteed irresistible.

1. He Has Mastered The Wink. We don't know how they learn the technique but some guys really have the Richard Gere wink down pat. There's an art to this wink and getting it right can be tricky. It's more suave and smoky than cheeky and laughable. He's comfortable giving this signal and has the timing to the tee. Done right, this move is pure sexy. Caveat: The wink can be tricky to pull off. Practice first.

2. He Radiates Calm. It's sending shivers up our spine just thinking about how powerful a man's calm presence can be. Neurotic or hyper or frenzied is stressful, no matter how busy the man or what his excuse. But if he's got cool written all over his face and his gaze is pure steady and peaceful his sex appeal will shoot through the roof (think old-school James Dean). We women can unwillingly fall into the trap of over-worrying about things we can't control. A man who sets us at ease by reminding us how things always manage to work out in the end is absolutely hot.

3. He Takes Care Of Himself. Look, we're not saying it's a certain height or build that matters. If he keeps his body in relatively good shape this shows us he knows how to take care of himself. It also clues us in that he sets health as a priority. What's more, if he's active, working out even a few times a week, the endorphins his body is producing during gym sessions are sure to keep him in good spirits and energized. The bottom line: If he takes good care of himself he's likely to take good care of his partner (or at least help keep her motivated to do so). That's a turn-on.

4. He's Got Style. We don't want to give the wrong idea here. This is not to say he has to be one certain type of style, and that mimicking a prescribed "it" style is a surefire path to sexy (whether that's clean-cut, tattooed-up or punked-out). Not at all. Rather, what's attractive in a guy is that he has a style at all, a way of dressing that reflects in some way who he is and what he's into. A guy who wakes up hum-drum and throws the same dingy shirt and pair of jeans on every day? Not sexy. At all.

5. He Has A Manly Scent. Sounds so animalistic, we know. No man can control his natural scent, and it turns out our DNA compatibility dictates who smells good to us, anyway. But, every guy can augment his essence with a spritz (one will do just fine) of cologne. As long as it's not overdone, a man with a strong scent has the potential to drive women wild.

6. He Is Affectionate. Though we women try not to let on, affection (be it an arm around the shoulder or hand on the leg) lights us up like fireflies. Consider it your secret weapon. By affection, we do mean to include expressing your feelings through words, such as "I love you." It's amazing how many hot men fall short of sexy just for lack of articulating and showing their love. Let's put it this way: There are guys who reach out to their partner while driving, and there are guys who keep both hands on the wheel and eyes straight ahead. The lads of the former group qualify for sexy.

7. He Laughs Loud, Hard, Often. No news flash here. Comedy is highly enticing. It's worth noting though that there are different types of humor. The insecure comedy that's based on putting others down or calling them names doesn't gibe with us. But give us fun-loving, belly-jiggling jokes and laughter and you'll head straight to the top of the sexiness charts.

10 Signs He's Not the One

Some people say they "just knew" that they were dating their future spouse. But what about the rest of us? What happens when you're not sure if he's The One? If you're considering long-term commitment or marriage, it's time to ask yourself some tough questions. Below, 10 signs that may indicate he's not for you.

1. You have a list of things he needs to stop doing/saying/wearing if he wants your relationship to work. If you're fixating on his flaws, he's either not the one you want or you're not ready for a serious relationship. Cutting him loose allows you time to grow and gives you the opportunity to meet a guy whose flaws you can embrace -- or at least accept.

2. You don't trust him. A small dose of jealousy can be healthy, but if you're hacking into his email account, and going berserk when he goes out without you, something's wrong. If there's something about him that truly warrants your distrust, then perhaps he's not the right one for you.

3. You avoid conflict at any cost. Fighting is healthy. And, when done right (in the non-accusatory, rational sort of way), it can be a great way to air grievances, fix problems in your relationship, and come to a deeper understanding of each other. Ignoring problems is not the same as having no problems at all... even if it looks that way.

4. When you're sad, you don't turn to him for comfort. When you're a giant ball of tears and snot, do you lock yourself into the bathroom so he can't see you at your worst? If you're worried about scaring him away, one of you isn't ready for total commitment. Mr. Right should make you smile through your tears and be a calming, not stressful, presence.

5. One of you is struggling with an addiction. He's sweet. He's exciting. He loves you very much. But he loves his alcohol habit or his weekly gambling fix more. Don't fool yourself into thinking that you can change him or that your relationship will be strong enough to withstand the heartache that addiction will inevitably bring. An addict may be able to change, but he'll do so on his own terms.

6. You can't really imagine him as the father of your children. Ask yourself: Would he make a great parent? Is he financially responsible? Would he be an equal partner in your future together? If you have doubts, he's probably not the one.

7. Your long-term, non-negotiable goals in life are incompatible. You want kids; he doesn't. You go to church every week; he's an atheist. He lives in the country and doesn't want to move; you can't imagine ever leaving the city. Superficial differences can be overcome, but differences in basic values are harder to smooth over. Ask yourself: "Would I be willing to compromise on this?" If the answer is absolutely not, you may not be right for each other.

8. You don't respect each other. He puts you down in front of your friends and complains about you to his parents. You roll your eyes when he talks because there's just something about him that embarrasses you. A relationship without respect can't sustain itself.

9. You're not attracted to him. Physical intimacy is a hugely important component of a romantic relationship. If he doesn't do it for you, he's probably not your best long-term match.

10. On paper he seems great, but you have this strange feeling... Don't ignore your gut. You may get along on a superficial level, but if your instincts are telling you he's not the one for you, listen. That little voice inside your head does not lie.

Why Men Don't Talk

As the editor of the biggest men's magazine in the world, I am privy to something many women rarely hear - straightforward, uninhibited guy talk.

Don't be so shocked - guys do actually talk, and not just about Tom Brady's quarterback rating. Most women think their man is the strong, silent type (or maybe the oblivious, silent type), and they wonder why he doesn't share his feelings.

But here's the truth: Men do want to open up, about their hopes, their fears, and their passions. Yet put him alone in a room with you, and he often turns into a Sphinx. Why can't he take his eyes off the TV and talk about the state of the relationship, or the finances, or, heck, the backyard landscaping? Why in the world can't he just summarize his day for 10 minutes?

In fact, one in five women say that they typically fight about a man's lack of verbal interaction, and 30 percent of men say their failure to communicate is the source of major conflict in the relationship. Why is it this way?

Here's one answer: Because even men who have feelings to share don't always feel comfortable sharing them with their partner. These are some of the reasons why some men often prefer to zip it, rather than delivering the goods:

Guys Are A Little Intimidated
No question, women are expert communicators. They throw questions like Oprah after her third cup of coffee; they're connecting on all cylinders. And like the divine Ms. W, women bring a lot of skill to their game: A special awareness of the people-scape around them, a keen set of emotions keyed to that awareness, and a rich vocabulary they use to talk about anything at anytime.

And they're always practicing their Q&A skills on their many friends, so they're in top talk mode all the time. Men know this. And they also know that more than one-third of women say that men simply can't relate and don't understand women. The result: Men are afraid of saying too much, because saying the wrong thing may get them into more trouble than Lindsay Lohan as a designated driver.

Guys Need To Decompress
Woman's view: When a man walks in the door, he ought to cough up some of the details about his day. After all, it's been 10 hours since they've communicated, not counting the two IMs, three voice mails, and one actual mid-day conversation.

Man's view: Can I please make a beeline to the bathroom? When men reach home, it's like those ultra-marathoners staggering across the finish line in Death Valley. The last thing they want to do is discuss how bright the sunlight was, and how scarce the water stops were.

Further up on his want-to-do list after arriving home: 14 percent of men want to check email, 12 percent are looking for a little private time in the bathroom, and 10 percent simply want to eat dinner. The common theme here: After they've spent a day serving the needs of others, they want to take care of themselves a little.

So when a man is hit with a demand for conversation so closely after returning from the stressful environment of work, he has only one gear left to shift into, and sometimes it's reverse. He's retreat, retreat, retreat.

Guys Are More Comfortable With Actions Than Feelings
Rather than talking about how he "feels," often a man would rather express his love by changing her oil, or bringing home a flower, or relinquishing control of the remote.

And when men do talk, they'd prefer to talk about actions rather than emotions. For instance, a lot of guys would choose to express their long-range faith in a relationship by talking about next summer's vacation plans, not by launching into a soliloquy about undying love.

Both conversations can mean the same thing (that he plans on sticking around); he just prefers to say it with plane tickets, rather than poetry. It's one of the reasons men are more comfortable talking at work (the practical universe) than they are at home (the castle that emotion built). But you can bring out his great communicator by making him feel more like he's operating in work mode, even when the topic at hand is your love life. Here's an incredible article, "The Home Office," that shows how he can use his best office skills for great success at home.

Guys Don't Want To Be Put On The Spot
When men talk less and women want more, the scenario can escalate. Like when the bad cop is pummeling the reluctant witness, more silence equals more questions. A full 65 percent of men we surveyed recently told us they don't want their partners to ask them more questions about themselves.

It's clear that some men are just plain tired of feeling like they're on the witness stand. They're not necessarily hiding anything; many guys simply prefer not to have to relate confusing feelings that they may not even understand themselves.

An age-old tactic can make things better: Back off a little, give him room to operate in a conversation, and he's more likely to open up. To find out if his lack of communication really does mean that your relationship needs a tune up, take this quick quiz.

What Is A SOULMATE And How To Attract Our SOULMATE

Every individual has a set of values, a set of priorities that they live their life by. Everybody creates their soul mate according to the hierarchy of their values,they also have a search image based on all the experience they’ve had with a relationship, anything that tend to support their values they tend to put into a composite image they’re searching for..anything that ‘s challenging they tend to avoid, having a built-in kind of filter trying to find this person who will fulfill them. If you’ve had a series of relationships in the past that have been very painful,very challenging, you will accumulate association with that to avoid that in the picture..

As a result of that, even if you say you want this..you want that..in your relationship..if you don’t know what you real values are, you don’t know what you’re really about, you will actually be seeking something that’s not true to you and you keep frustrate yourself because you keep creating what your values dictate, and if you’ve had pain dealing with one on one relationship for periods, you will automatically disburse all the traits you’re looking for into many people..

He then gave a real life example of one girl he met on a plane who's looking for 22 personality traits in a guy only to find out that all of these traits are in many different people in her life all along.She then did some soul-searching with the dr.'s help and 3 weeks later found her soulmate..

Soulmate is always in the form of either one or many,soulmate is always present, it’s never missing, but we don’t honor it

As long as there’s more pain with one person in the past than many, you’ll keep disbursing it.If you are able to see the blessings in all relationship,how they give u guidance,gave u feedback in being who u are and you are not infatuated with freedom and fantasies about relationship, the soulmate’s available to you and will manifest very quickly .

Our soulmate is a person who complements us and helps us grow the most.We don’t grow by getting the things that support, we grow the most we get support and challenge. A soulmate is the one who gives perfect complementation of support and challenge. If we have more similarities than differences, we’ re infatuated.If we see more differences than similarities, we resent them.But if we have a perfect blend of similarities and differences, agreements and disagreements, we get true love which is maximizing our growth process.

Because we get nothing but support if stay juvenile,infatuated and blind. When we get nothing but challenge,we become withdrawn.But if we put the two things together, we get awesome lovemaking, which keeps us enduring a patient relationship.That’s the secret and that’s why a soul mate has the combination things we’re looking for and things that make us grow in challenges.And we attract people who have complementary values many times, so we’re seeking that to support our values and also attract that challenge our values...because the things we need is also things that we have low areas in our values so we can attract some and we can delegate utilitarian purposes to.

It’s not what they do,it’s your perception of your support and challenge.If you get too much support, you get bored, If you get too much challenge, you get burned out.So a maximum relationship occurs in the middle of bored and burned out.When you see thing that’s supporting you, how is it challenging you.When you see things that’s challenging you, how is it supporting you.

The soul is no question.There’s nothing but love and serenity.When you first get with somebody, the way you know you’re infatuated, is you start sacrificing the thing that’s important to you to be with them and start feeling the loss of them...if you start feeling the loss of them, you’re infatuated.and when you’re trying to be somebody you’re not to be with them, to keep them, you’re not being yourself and you will accumulate moments of resentment that you will download on that person and punish them because of the things you thought you sacrificed because you were not able to be yourself during the infatuation periods.

And then you wanna change them and this is undermining the relationship.When you're doing what you love and loving what you do and be true to yourself, you have the highest probability to attract a mate.When you're trying to be somebody you’re not,you’re automatically undermining, because now you got to go back being yourself and hope that they still love you. Be inspired by your own life and empower your own life.

Ask yourself this question when you meet a guy/girl who’s hot. You might ask..”what’s in it for them to be with me” if you’re not empowered in all areas of your own life,you’re not offering something. Any areas in your life that you’re disempowering is the area they’re gonna control.So you wanna make sure you’re empowered in your own life so you have the package to deal.Because they're never committed to you in a relationship, that’s a fantasy most people stuck with. They are for you to offer in fulfilling their values.

Once you realize that, you have to offer your values,in their value system to be able be something that they still wanna be with.If you don’t do that, and take it for granted..you start projecting your values on then and expect them to live according to your life and you guide, you start undermining the relationship and you’re pushing them to the door. You gotta find what their values are,you gotta honor them, you gotta learn to communicate yours in term of theirs to get what you want, and in the process of doing that, you get to experience love, and always keep it balanced,that’s the only way to keep a stable relationship.

Infatuation is what makes us blind,not love. When you love, there is no space and time.When you’re infatuated with them, you’re too humble to admit what u see in them is what's inside you, when you’re resenting them, you’re too proud to admit what you see in them is what’s inside you.but when you love them, you don’t have to pry self righteousness or the humbleness that way,you just see eye to eye in a relationship because you understand and have a respect for their unique values.

If you can't respect them for what they’re dedicated to,you’re not ready for a relationship with them, because if that’s who they are, you gotta love them for who they are and not what you fantasize that you’re gonna make them and punish them till they get there.